I have talked about writing an article about children and their cards for a
long time. There was even the thought of doing a complete book about it.
It certainly deserves it. But for now, an article will serve to convey some of
my thoughts on the subject. I hope you find this interesting and
informative.
There are several benefits from knowing the cards that can have direct
implications upon our relationships with our children. First, it can help us
understand them better. In understanding our children more we can
harmonize our decisions about them with their true natures, helping them
to reach their goals better and complimenting their basic natures instead of
competing with them. It’s a sad fact that many parents impose their
doctrines and ideals upon their children, never questioning whether or not
these ideals are good for the children or not. They may be good for us but our
children are not always like us. Many times they are very different from us
and our structures, which we hold so dear, can be destructive of our
children’s basic natures. Understanding the nature of our children’s Birth
and Planetary Ruling Cards can help us help them. And isn’t helping our
children what we really want to do?
The other benefit is that looking at the way the card system describes our
relationships with our children can help us understand the dynamic of our
being with them. If we see, for example, that one of our children is our
Mars Card in the Life Spread, we could know that they make us angry, but
not on purpose. The anger we feel about them is just a function of how their
personality blends with ours. That realization could alleviate a lot of
conflict and in some cases, abuse. We could stop thinking that they are
doing things to make us mad on purpose and just realize that anyone with
that card would probably have the same affect on us. That could help us to
not get mad when we usually would. What a blessing that would be!
So, let’s take a look at our children and our relationship with them from the
cards’ point of view and see what we can learn. As you read these
descriptions, keep in mind that it can be their Birth Card or Planetary
Ruling Card. These general guidelines will help you understand your
children but keep in mind that I have lumped the cards of the same number
together. There are additional distinctions by virtue of their suit that I may
not mention here.
Children who are:
Aces – are ambitious and active. They are vessels of God’s creative force
and always are into something. They can be impatient and overly
aggressive at times. They can be leaders and are usually courageous. They
are working a lot on self-confidence. You can help them by giving them
responsibility to do things in order for them to develop the self-confidence
that they can set goals and achieve them. They get a lot of joy and
fulfillment from accomplishment. Allow them to have their dreams and
encourage them to pursue their desires without judging them harshly
when they fail or do not accomplish their goals. Encourage them to finish
what they start without judging them for not finishing things they start. Be
just as proud of their accomplishments as they are. Tell them it is okay to
be special for what they do because this is what they truly want and need.
Be sure and reward them for accomplishing things that you ask them to do.
Also, never diagnose them with some attention deficit disorder just
because they have more energy than you do.
Twos – are talkative and like to be with someone. They are highly
intelligent but often have fears, mostly fears of being alone or losing their
loved ones. They are usually the most beautiful children. Encourage their
mental gifts and reward them for their brilliance, but don’t forget that they
usually have great fears inside. Allow them to express these feelings and to
know that they are safe to do so with you. Be proud of their intelligence but
do not make it a condition of your love. The world we live in already
rewards the intelligent more than most others. Make your love
unconditional for them.
Threes – are usually the most active of children, along with the Fives. And
they will be the most creative and at other times, fearful and worried. They
are the ones most commonly diagnosed with attention deficit disorders.
But remember that ADD is just a word invented by doctors to describe a
group of behaviors. It is not really a disease at all and most Threes will
exhibit these characteristics because they are so highly creative. Never give
these kids drugs to calm them down. Instead, get them involved in
activities where their abundant and natural creativity can be expressed.
Have them explore different art forms, music, pottery, creative writing,
acting and other avenues. Remember they may not have any attraction
to practicality or organization. Encourage their uniqueness and the
expression of the many ideas they have. Do not get mad at them when they
jump from one activity to the other. Instead encourage interest in a variety
of healthy avenues of self-expression so that they always have options to
choose from and to move to. You may have a world-class artist living in
your home. Try not to have these children fit into a mold that you, or
society, has created for them. Allow them to be themselves, not you.
Fours – enjoy structure and routine. They actually need structure more
than most of the other kids. Keep their surroundings orderly and their life
on a predictable schedule. This is what makes them feel safe and at home.
These children are builders and organizers. Allow them to build things and
listen to their suggestions for how you can do things better when they make
them. Security is very important to them and if you realize what their
security is made of, you can coexist with them peacefully. The 4© needs
people, mostly his or her family, the 4§ needs order, routine, and
explanations for everything to feel safe, the 4¨ needs money and the
opportunity to work for it while the 4ª will take security from home, family
and in doing things. These kids can be very stubborn if this security is
threatened. Encourage them to work for what they want. Give them chores
and a schedule and follow up with it consistently. Consistency is what they
need most from you.
Fives – are restless and adventurous. Like children who are Threes, they
can be treated for ADD even though this is just part of their personality.
They may not stay with things very long. They are not here to accomplish
things but to experience things. The experiencing of things is more
important to them than acquisition or the attainment of other goals. So try not to
impose any goal-oriented value system upon them. They often end up with
an overbearing father figure who tries to mold them into some rigid
structure. Is that you? If so, lighten up or you may condemn them to years
of therapy along with aversion for any authority figures, which will
ultimately hurt their chances for accomplishment later in life. These kids
love to travel and try new things. Take them hiking, camping and traveling.
If they are just too wound up, take them for a ride in your car. That will
always calm them down.
Sixes – are much more aware of the concept of responsibility than others.
And the concept of fairness. This awareness can cause them to be very hard
on themselves, so much so that that they get angry with anyone who
accuses them of anything. And for this same reason, they make fierce
competitors, often excelling in sports. They are somewhat under Saturn’s
hand their entire life and are their own biggest judge and jury. Try to
understand this so that you do not add to the burden they are already
carrying. When you see them being irresponsible, be loving but firm and
help them back on the path. They can be somewhat quiet and immovable at
times. They are usually very sensitive to everyone around them, much more
so than you may imagine. And the feelings of those around them can
really affect their peace of mind. See if you can provide them with a
peaceful surrounding as much as possible. They love and thrive on
beauty and harmony. Help them achieve a balance between being
irresponsible and being very hard on themselves for not doing
what they think they ‘should’ do in order to deserve your love. Do not
underestimate their intelligence either. Some of them are geniuses.
Sevens – are sensitive children who go from being very happy and
carefree to being worried, pessimistic or depressed. Help them achieve
some balance with this by explaining that life is not all good or all bad. All
Sevens have gifts of some sort, an area where they are connected to a God-
like force. Their natural gifts are often amazing to behold. Encourage
the development and expression of these gifts. Many of these kids are very
powerful and need to learn not to bully others. Help them see how powerful
they are and at the same time how much their power can affect other
children and people around them. Help them use this power responsibly.
They are all born with a notion that they are special in some way. Let them
know that they are special and that it is okay to be special. They often end
up in leadership positions when they grow up.
Eights – are dynamic, stubborn, strong and powerful. They are going to
try and get their way whatever the cost and usually will. Do not let their
natural power scare you or you will end up competing with them which will
probably result in your losing out to them. See this power in them and
encourage them to use it to help others. Hopefully it will be okay with
you if they are more powerful than you. Take delight in how clever they can
be while not allowing them to make things happen that could hurt them or
others. Realize that they are going to be pretty stubborn and will not
take direction as easily as other kids. But once they learn something, they
will not forget it. So, be patient and consistent and help them
see how their power can affect others so that they can learn to use it wisely.
Nines – are very sensitive children who feel the feelings of everyone
around them. They are kind and gentle and likely to help others before
anyone asks them to. They will even help others and get their feelings hurt
when the others do not repay them in kind. They are very psychic and you
should encourage them to share what they pick up on. Some of them may
even remember their former lives and tell you about them at an early age.
These children are somewhat prone to disappointment as they have some
notions about life that are not consistent with reality. This is their karma,
not yours. Help them to see the truth and that they are not victims in this
world while at the same time allowing them freedom to make their own
choices. Help them see that it is their choices that determine their fate.
Tens – are full of ambition and energy and usually bent on accomplishment.
Encourage them to set goals for themselves and let them know how proud you are
when they achieve them. They may have too much energy for you at times
but that is their nature. They are here to do things, not just talk about them
and many have some special gifts. If they say, “someday I will grow up to be
president”, don’t doubt it. If they shoot for the stars, they may at the least
reach the moon. In some ways the world is their apple. But try to instill
in them a sense of value that encourages them to help others as they reach
for their goals.
Jacks – are fun loving and may never really grow up. They are the Peter
Pans of the deck and are inquisitive and full of ideas. They enjoy having fun
more than most children. Games and stories, role-playing and fun are their
domain. They may shirk responsibility to some extent and are destined to
deal with it more and more as they grow up. They are proud of themselves
and expect others to recognize their special-ness. Encourage their creative
expression in whatever form they seem drawn to. Many have special
creative gifts that can be developed into a satisfying career later in life.
Teach them the value of honesty and integrity as their model of the
world may give little value to these concepts.
Queens – are loving and mothering of others and have a great ability to
take responsibility. You may notice them taking responsibility for their
siblings at an early age. But they are also proud and know that they are
special in some way. Help them feel that it is okay to have a special destiny.
Many of these children are creative as well and should be encouraged to
develop their creative gifts in whatever area they express an interest. The
children who are Queens will also act much like the ones described below
who are Kings, since they share much of the leadership ability that the
Kings enjoy.
Kings – are natural leaders and will naturally take a leadership role from
an early age. They may even rule the entire household from an early age.
Encourage them to take responsibility and watch what happens. They
can be stubborn and strong willed but keep in mind that this is not a foot
soldier you are raising here but a King! Authority figures will always
be tested by them and they may not acknowledge authority naturally
as many children do. They are the authority, if you see what I mean. They
will demand higher standards from their parents and you better be ready to
measure up. Even so, they are usually very loving and will make you proud
if you give them the chance. Try to avoid micromanaging them but
instead assign them tasks and reward them for being responsible.
Your Relationship With Your Children The next step in this article is to
discuss how we relate to our children through the relationship connections
we share with them. This is also very important and can set the
stage for an increased understanding of them, which can be very beneficial.
The main point I would like to make here is that many parents need to take
more responsibility for themselves in their relationship with their kids. If
you are a parent who finds yourself fighting with your kids or getting angry
at them all the time, this is an indication that you are probably not looking
at yourself very much but instead blaming them for what you may be
feeling about what they do or say. The best thing we can do for our kids is
to be grown up and admit our own faults while trying to set a good role
model of an adult. A parent that fights with their children is not really
being an adult at all. Use the same connections in Love Cards that
you would for other relationships. But apply some of the meanings below to
them for your children.
The Moon Connection
When a Moon connection exists between a parent and child, it is usually a
blessing in their relationship. If the parent is the Moon Card, then they will
naturally assume a mothering and supportive role with the child,
which is the natural order of things. Keep in mind that in this case, the
child will naturally want to lead the relationship and in many
cases suggest or decide what you will do together or where you will go, etc. I
consider it to be very good karma for any child who has a mother that is
Moon to them. If you are a leader type yourself and yet the Moon Card to
your child, this may cause a problem for you. We cannot fight these
energies. Well, we can, but it will not change them in the least. If you
are the Moon Card, be a mother to your child, giving complete and
unconditional love, and forget about the rest. If, on the other hand,
your child is your Moon Card, then it is your job to show your child what to
do and where to go, etc. You are the leader and I will bet that your child will
love the things you turn them on to and the places you take them. The
communication with your child will be very good with this connection and
it is a blessing to be acknowledged fully.
The Venus Connection
Having a Venus connection with your child is very good as it promotes
general compatibility and love between you. If you are your child’s Venus
Card, you know that they love you because you are the embodiment of what
they love in life. If the reverse is true you feel this way about them. Either
way, this creates a strong bond that makes the two of you want to spend
time together. A past life Venus connection (from the Spiritual Spread)
could mean the two of you have been married in a former lifetime, an
energy that most mothers or fathers can feel.
The Mars Connection
This one is very important to take note of and understand. A lot of
problems can be alleviated or eliminated by an understanding of how this
can manifest in your relationship with your children. It is important to
know if you are their Mars Card or if they are yours. If they are your Mars
Card, this can be problematic. Here you have a child who represents in
some way the things that you dislike about yourself. This causes you to get
angry at them when they act a certain way. However, you need to know that
your anger in this case is really about your relationship with yourself. The
child is just acting the way they do for their own reasons. They are not
intentionally trying to make you mad. It’s just that you have a ‘mad button’
that certain things they do will push. Try to control your anger and take it
to a deeper level instead of getting mad and abusing your child, either
verbally or otherwise. They are not the enemy. In this case, all of the
problems of the relationship fall on your shoulders. It is up to you.
If, on the other hand, you are the Mars Card of your child, the reverse is
true. Things you do or say will energize them, in some cases making them
angry at you. The best use of this Mars energy that you catalyze in them is
to do constructive things. Do things with your child. Work together, play
together but by all means be energetic with them. Avoid games where you
compete with them for this will only make things worse. Instead, choose
cooperative games. Be on their side, like the coach of their little league or
something like that. This way, your Mars energy is working together to
achieve a common goal instead of being directed at each other
competitively. How is a child supposed to compete with you anyway?
The Jupiter Connection
This connection doesn’t have any outstanding characteristics that would
have a great impact on your relationship with your child. It does promote a
mutual understanding of life and philosophies which in turn promotes
compatibility between you, and sometimes a spiritual bond. If you are
Jupiter to your child in the Life Spread, that child will benefit from
you in many ways, including financially.
The Saturn Connection
This connection can be good or bad, depending mostly on the
consciousness of the parent. When the parent is the Saturn Card to
the child, this can be an ideal connection since the father in particular in a
parent/child relationship is meant to teach the child self-discipline and to
set boundaries for the child. It can happen with the mother too, and often
in a situation where the child’s father is absent. The trick is to not be too
heavy handed about it. Just your presence is enough for the child to be on
his or her best behavior, and a reminder to them. You probably will
not even have to say anything. With this in mind, be loving and clear when
you do criticize the child, knowing that he or she already feels criticized by
you most of the time. Teach your child by example more than punishment.
Also, watch a tendency to be overly harsh with them. Perhaps your zealous
pursuit of perfection in your children is actually a manifestation of some
areas within yourself where you feel lacking. Be honest about this and do
not try and make your children perfect to overcome your own imperfection.
If your child is your Saturn Card then they can see all your weaknesses and
faults. They love you deeply but God has given them the gift to be your
teacher and they will unconsciously seek to help you reach perfection by
reminding you of where you are lacking. But how many adults can accept
their child as their teacher? This, as you can see, can present a real
problem. But these energies cannot be changed. Hopefully you will earn
your child’s respect by being the best parent you can.
The Uranus Connection
This is another important connection to be aware of because it can drive
parents wild when it exists in a certain respect. Specifically when the child
is your Uranus Card, they will seem to defy your direction and attempts to
mold them. Since most parents believe it is their job to direct and mold
their children, this can be infuriating. The Uranian child will consistently
seem to do exactly the opposite that you tell them to. And for the most part
this will not be a conscious thing on their part. Their unpredictable nature,
from your point of view alone, will have them showing up late or not at all
or, in most cases, doing what you feel they shouldn’t. You have to realize
that God has given you this Uranus child to help you let go of some of your
concepts and attachments. The more you try to control them, the farther
they will drift from you. You may have to let them go their own way most of
the time and have faith that they will get all that they need and deserve
from the rest of the people in their life. If you do, you will have them as a
friend for life.
If you are the Uranus Card to your child, this can cause a sense of
uncertainty in them because they never know, from their point of view, if
you can be trusted or depended upon. This is a specific karmic pattern for
your child, one in which there is probably little you can do about it except
be aware and compassionate. If you can reassure them that you love them
and never intend to leave them hanging, it might help. The two of you will
be friends for life.
The Neptune Connection
This connection creates a psychic link with your child, along with a certain
amount of fantasy. If they are your Neptune Card in the Life Spread, they
will the child who can never do any wrong in your eyes. But this perception
often turns out to be an illusion and many parents with this connection are
shocked when they eventually find out that their child has all the same
problems as other children, or sometimes a lot more. Overall it is a good
connection as long as the parent is not ignoring what might be serious
problems in the personality or behavior of the child. When the parent is the
Neptune Card to the child the reverse is true and this child will overlook the
parent’s faults. This occurs frequently with children whose Birth or
Planetary Ruling Card falls in the Neptune column or row of the Life
Spread. It also occurs with children whose Birth Card or PR Card is a Nine
or Six, since both of these have a great deal of Neptune energy associated
with them. This child will adore his or her parent in spite of what may be
many bad characteristics in them. And this child will certainly forgive the
sins of the parent over and over again.
The Pluto Connection
This connection is like a super Mars connection. So all that applies to the
Mars connection applies here, but in a more intensified way. Combined
with a Saturn connection this would invariably lead to abuse of some kind.
A child who is your Pluto Card, but especially the one in the Life Spread, is
going to challenge you and bring up feelings that are intense and often
explosive. It is the nature of Pluto to unearth the deepest and most hidden
feelings we have and this relationship could certainly do that to the parent.
This would not be something that the child is doing consciously or
intentionally so that the burden of responsibility for what actually happens
in the relationship falls upon the parent. But Pluto, being so strong in its
expression, can often be hard to control. If the parent is the Pluto Card of
the child, the reverse is true. Knowing this, the parent can at least
understand that their presence in the life of the child is indeed challenging
on a deep level. Children, having less life experience, may not have a chance
of bringing any consciousness into this area where intense feelings may
dominate their behavior. On the positive side, this connection could be
an impetus for the child to make some fundamental changes in life.
However, since this energy would be present anytime the child is with the
parent, the child may choose to distance himself or herself from this parent
once they are old enough to take care of themselves. It may be just too
intense to have around all the time.
Other Connections
Karma Card connections between parents are common and represent
karmic paybacks from previous lives. The parent and child are
mirrors of each other and at least one of the two have a more difficult time
with the mirror than the other. This is usually the one who has the other as
a first Karma Card. This connection also symbolizes a direct transference of
characteristics from the parent to the child. And the child will be a lot
like this parent in particular. Children who are the same Birth Card as one
of their parents likewise share many of their traits. Thus, the parent gets a
chance to see his or her good and bad in the actions and deeds of this child.
How the parent reacts to this and the Karma Card child will all depend
upon how well the parent has come to accept their own good and bad traits.
These relationships can be just as intense as the Karma Card relationships
in some cases because of this mirroring effect. The same basic thing occurs
when the child’s Birth or PR Card matches the parent’s Birth, PR Card or
Karma Card. In all these cases, there is a direct transference of personality
traits and the mirroring principle involved. In many cases the child’s first
name will be the same as the parent as well. Whenever you have a parent
and child with the same name, check all their personal significators.
Usually you will find a match somewhere since the same name has a similar
effect as having the same card.
In Conclusion I hope this information can help us be better parents. The
one point that stands out more than all the rest, at least in my mind, is that
we parents have the greater burden of responsibility when it comes to how
well we get along with our children. They are young and less experienced
than us and are more likely to act out negative traits more readily.
Hopefully, because we are older and more experienced, we will be able to
act more maturely and with discretion. This guide to the cards and
connections can serve to enlighten this more important area of our lives.
